Humour – The Fight Director

Scott Witt

Scott Witt

Things you’ll never hear a Fight Director say…

  • Yeah – it’s fine that you can’t get the real weapons til the final dress rehearsal… no worries.
  • As you’ve not got a budget for fights for your period production of Romeo and Juliet, of course I’ll direct them for free… no worries.
  • It’s fine that you don’t have time to do any fight rehearsals til after the technical runs… no worries
  • You want me to provide weapons for free? Sure!

Things you shouldn’t ask a Fight Director

  • “Can you get the actors to do it as good as you do it?”
  • “Can we do that large broad sword fight in bare feet?”
  • “Is two free tickets to a Saturday matinee enough payment for the 70 hours you have put in?”
  • “Can we get you to come in on the last preview and look at what we have put together?”

Things the Fight Director shouldn’t have to say

  • Oh you don’t need a fight director because you know what you are doing?
  • Oh you don’t need a fight director to work out that broad sword fight as you have got a fencer in the show??
  • You want the disarm of that sword to fly through the air towards the star cloth?
  • You want the disarm of that sword to fly through the air towards the audience?
  • So let me get this right; you want a full blown battle with 16 actors and you have given me 2 hours…and sorry what was that?… no one has done any stage combat before?
  • You don’t need any advice on the contact slap you are doing… ???

Supplied by

Scott Witt
Actor, Clown, Fight Director and Director
Australia
(November 2003)